The thing that brought me back

There were multiple things that brought me back to yoga:
The realization that I had fallen in love with making yoga schedules, and my home practice. Right from my first yoga class!
I had already been doing these things late 90s, before I had even started my teacher training.
And I had also liked the private classes I had taught, especially in the final year my studio had existed. The 1-on-1s with these students, in my basement studio.
Yet I still had not decided I was going to make a come-back as a teacher.
Too hung up perhaps on not wanting to go freelance again, with something that had not provided a decent living in the final years.
So yes: I was going to pick up making yoga schedules, and do my own practice.
But no: I didn’t intend to make my living out of it because duh, that wasn’t working.
Instead, I was going to pursue a career in business, and no longer be bothered with the worries of running your own yoga studio in a market that had gotten increasingly competitive.
But the more concrete the career became (what business, what job) the less enthusiastic I became.
To make matters worse, in the meanwhile I had stopped writing.
Without my yoga classes at night to keep me grounded, and my 5 or 6 PM deadline to shut off my computer, my place in this world had become disturbingly unclear.
Was it really my purpose to just publish my four new books, and write a diary post each day?
How on earth was I going to fill my days, in a way that didn’t feel totally isolated?
The carefree writing I had planned on doing, unbothered by worries of having to “make” my studio work, turned out to be a trap…
So on one hand there were all these red flags surrounding my new job as an employee, and my side hustle as a writer.
And on the other hand there were these elements of yoga I had liked.
Not to mention the delicate equilibrium writing and yoga had turned out to be!
When I left my yoga studio behind in 2018, after teaching for 15 teaching and writing for 12 years, I had insufficiently realized, they had been a team.
The two had developed in conjunction.
And although it was understandable that I had cherry picked writing, and discarded yoga because it was no longer making enough money-
it was also not the end of the story.
Writing had never lived, without yoga.
As the months went by, and I grew increasingly desperate about my unsatisfactory writing and the big question of what to do with my life. It felt like I was going in circles.
And then little pieces of the puzzle started to appear. I wanted to coach, as Lauren Harteveld. I wanted to share my yoga schedules on my blog under my real name.
In the slipstream of sharing my yoga schedules there, the desire grew to to start teaching privates again as well.
And after setting up the idea to start teaching privates under my real name, I wanted to start teaching privates as Lauren Harteveld as well.
I have not created the offer yet, but it will be private yoga classes for women, here in Nijmegen.
Yet still, the vision wasn’t complete.
They were just pieces of the puzzle. I couldn’t feel what they were leading up to.
And then the strangest thing happened.
I saw a photo on Facebook from a Strala studio, the studio of Tara Stiles.
And I got it!
I reconnected back to 2005-2010 (rough estimate!) when I was suffering from Dutch yoga escapism, by reading Yoga Journals, an American yoga glossy, and also watching the earliest videos from Tara Stiles on YouTube.
By the time she released her book, Slim Calm Sexy Yoga, I practically camped on Amazon to be the first to order.
In the following years she became better known, and all her later books have been translated to Dutch.
But having that first one, still makes my heart sing!
And seeing that photo, from the Strala studio in New York, a place that no longer even exists because Tara Stiles and her family moved up into the mountains – but the picture of that studio brought me back to the time when my identification with being a yoga teacher had been strongest.
The urban, American, studio vibe I had been absorbing 2005-2010, or maybe 2011.
I saw that picture and I knew:
That is me.
THAT is my teaching vibe.
Tara Stiles may have moved up into the mountains to connect with nature, but here is where I dwell… here is where the heart is.
Inner city yoga life.
Between the cabs, the noise, the busyness.
I am an inner city private yoga teacher.
Namaste.

 

~Lauren
Follow the marshmallows. *

my offer for private yoga will appear on my Dutch site:
Zeg maar Lauren

Upcoming:

I ve rebooted my YouTube Channel!
Subscribe to my YouTube and be the first to get my new video Monday April 1

Yoga Challenge

After being brough back to basics by Tara Stiles, I remembered I have an entire archive on a yoga challenge I did.
It was 2011 I think, and it lasted for 21 weeks!
It’s a weekly challenge, based on the book Slim Calm Sexy Yoga
This was also the first yoga blog I ever had.
I m going to retrieve that diary, and their schedules, and reboot this home yoga challenge for this site.
Stay tuned!

*) Follow the marshmallows is based on the idea that the most likely way God will show you your path, is by making it look urgent and/or very appealing.
You will feel an urge, a rush of energy, a pull towards it!
Like wanting to pick up teaching yoga 😉
It will actually require effort to not do it, to restrain yourself. 

Don’t restrain, eat the marshmallow.  And more likely than not, the second marshmallow will appear immediately after.

Work with me { my first sales page! } 

My diaries en erotica are available at 
my BOOK SHOP
25% discount on all prices
If you check your cart, you can select your store
f.e. Nederland or United States
with the flag in the upper right corner.

Nederlandse boeken kun je ook direct bij mij bestellen

About this blog

Is the sixth chapter of
7-figure Rock Star Writer part 2: 
Always eat the marshmallow

The subscription button to this blog is on this page, probably on the right.

Follow on Facebook or Twitter,
NEW connect on Linkedin

coming soon: new books

1. Reboot – a hero’s journey. Diary 2017-2019
2. I M NOT CHANGING MY FUCKING SHOW
3. Big Mistress – confessions, columns and sex advice from the other woman
4. Blote Kont- verhalen over mannen, macht en dagjes uit (Dutch)

The best way to receive updates on when these books are ready is to follow this blog. The subscription button to this blog is on this page, probably on the right.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s