Turns out I had mixed up two movies;
Shakespeare in Love (1998) and Elizabeth (1998).
And with that two actresses (Cate Blanchet and Gwyneth Paltrow).

But the movies were related: Both are situated in the 16th century and Shakespeare in Love’s Violet lives under the rule of the older Queen Elizabeth the first, from the other movie.

And, which in itself explains why I got the two mixed up, the love interest to both women is played by the same actor, Joseph Fiennes.
Even in 1998 this must have been cause of confusion, although costume drama was not exactly my territory and I am pretty sure I never saw either of these movies in cinema.
Did see Fallen and Starship Troopers in the theaters though!
There is nothing wrong with my memory.
But the two confusingly similar movies about the British court as well as actor Joseph Fiennes (I was a Brad Pitt-only fan) were outside of my area of interest, at the time.

Yet I am now feeling such affinity to the Virgin Queen, Elizabeth. Who gave up her courtship to Ralph Fiennes and declared herself to be married to England, thereby becoming her work.
Her humanity was no longer of concern, as she would serve the work she was called to do.

About 10 days ago I also wrote a post, The Updated Rules of Engagement, on what would happen if I would start dating again.
And I think that post set something in motion.

I know there is a procedure, there is clarity of how my writing, privacy, consent, friendship and sex, are all just steps in a predictable and tried and tested arrangement.
It’s how I’ve been doing it for the past 10 years, and it’s what works for me.

And that post gave so much peace.
I gave up being responsible for meeting new men or having a sex life, and can clearly see my only responsibility has ever been to create the framework that brought it all together.
And that’s done.

Meanwhile I look back on 15 years of Lauren Harteveld writing, the majority still unpublished. The stories were blogged, but there’s also work still on my computer and even on paper.
My work now is to publish it, and to not be distracted by a desire to be loved nor to belong. 

I am a virgin writer.

.
~Lauren
An unexamined life is not worth living

Harteveld 2025*
Are 2200 characters, or less.
The name is inspired by the book Fretz 2025 by Johan Fretz and asterisk by the  2025 movie Thunderbolts*