I know this feeling!

Most vivid and immediate memory dates back to the 20th century, but since this post is one in the 1991 Behind The Scenes category
– where I try and usually fail to live on a newly created timeline as if it’s 35 years ago –
I guess the memory being ancient should be a recommendation, not a sign it’s redundant.

But yes, this amazing, bedazzling, intoxicating power boost feeling, and its stark contrast to the dark, stagnant time period that preceded it, are exactly what happened after my first heartbreak.
And it is happening right now.

In both cases received with a dangerously wide smile and a roaring laugh:
“Oh my God! I really fucking lost it there!”

In both cases this effect was from hardrock music.

In 1989, it was Guns N’ Roses.
I had never listened to them with my ex-boyfriend and was pretty sure he would hate it.
Both the music as well as my new look, which went from stark, all black new wave, to a mostly black rock-inspired one. Blue jeans went from being an unwelcome lighter item to being a clear, ripped and LOUD statement of unapologetic sexuality.

I started wearing rock t-shirts, grew my hair out and sported a shoulder length red mane, later a platinum blonde one.

And now?

Not a broken heart I’m recovering from. Even I would never let myself be hit that hard (years?!) over a broken heart.
Matter of principle.

No, I’ve been in an incredibly dark place, that did not have a name.
Ultimately, I escaped.
And yet something was still missing;
My soul.

But I know now, how “She” can be summoned!
My original teenage spirit.
And in its most powerful mutation.

She was resurrected by listening to copious amounts of The Cult and Mötley Crüe.
And no watering down either, their Best ofs, straight up the vein.

Got to go, friends.
1991 just called.

~Lauren
An unexamined life is not worth living

Video (not mine) coincidentally just released: They Actually Studied Gen X Metalheads (the truth about 80’s metal fans)
On the positive role of metal music (to which Guns N’ Roses would lead me into) for Generation X, just got its own video. If the topic interests you, you may want to check it out.